I can’t Help It

Ok, look – I WANT to pretend I’m mature enough not to giggle about this, but, fuck it – I’m not.

I went to CVS today to pick up a prescription, and there was a girl in front of me in line. Now, we’ve all bought condoms before, it’s no big deal, but this girl had two 12 packs of Magnums in her hand, AND, here’s the kicker – a bottle of Astroglide.

Now, never mind the fact that I could probably use a Trojan Magnum as a freakin’ SLEEPING BAG – the sheer volume of king sized lubricated protection, combined with the need for additional friction-mitigating substance had me calmly pursing my lips.

In poker, we have the concept of multi-level thinking.

Level one: I know what my hand is. I am here to pick up a prescription for some antibiotic cream because I have knerpes – that’s knee herpes: it’s a simple rash on my knee (note: not really herpes)

Level two: What does my opponent have? Well, she has the tools to make for a very active weekend, with a partner who apparently has a gigantic hammer.

Level three: What does my opponent think that I have? Well, she probably doesn’t know I have knerpes, cause she’s in front of me in line. And I have no idea what prescription she’s picking up.

Level four: What does she think that I think that she has? See, this is the fun one, cause we both know that she knows that I know that she’s got two jumbo packs of Magnums and a bottle of Astroglide (thankfully, it appeared to be a normal sized bottle of Astroglide – if she had the pint sized I don’t think I’d have been able to stifle a chuckle). She knows she’s gonna get seriously slammed this weekend. I KNOW she’s going to get seriously slammed this weekend. She knows that I’m judging her, but she may not know that I know the extent of her plans, and she’s trying to act nonchalant about it.

No post about lube would be complete without the following video from Superbad:

until next time,

Kid Dynamite is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. If you click on my Amazon.com links and buy anything, even something other than the product advertised, I earn a small commission, yet you don't pay any extra. Thank you for your support.

The information in this blog post represents my own opinions and does not contain a recommendation for any particular security or investment. I or my affiliates may hold positions or other interests in securities mentioned in the Blog, please see my Disclaimer page for my full disclaimer.

blog comments powered by Disqus
Kiddynamitesworld Blog